Suitedjustice's Ongoing Mid-life Crisis
I woke up in the middle of choking to death again; though to be accurate, it was towards the end of the process--woke up right away in a white hot panic with black spots of permanent unconsciousness swooping in across both sides of my vision.
Calm yourself, was the first important step. My lungs were soaked, steeped in the things that belonged only in my stomach, and locked up tight. My air passage was blocked and burning with bile and hydrochloric acid. No, I don't have asthma. I have a drinking problem.
Spoiler
Though, now that I think about it, is that inhaler thing any good? Maybe I'll try a hit sometime, just to see.
This was last Friday, just a few hours after I'd quit my office job of twelve years to take a shot at playing poker for a living out West in Nevada. This will not be my first shot at gambling for a living; although I have only tried something like this once before, many years ago.
Around the turn of the century I quit college most of the way through my senior year and I moved out to Las Vegas for 8 years. My experiences were somewhat of interest: rampant drunkenness, a stolen lab animal, solid card counting, North Korean meth, time spent with Mormons, advantage slot grinding, a cowardly pass on an FBI Most Wanted bounty, facing contempt of court charges, and dressing up as Albus Dumbledore. You can find that in my BBV thread.
[U][url]https://forumserver.twoplustwo.c...[/U][/URL] .
That thread held up pretty well in BBV, which is not nothing.
Starting meditative relaxation can be problematic when you're dying from choking on your own puke. I sat up straight, blind from the black splotches that had slapped away the weak light of the kitchen stove. I dropped my shoulders, relaxed my chest and upper arms, and then, projecting calm with all my might, I tried my throat. I pictured my lungs and throat opening up just a tiny passage, for just a little air to go by--something to get me started. And they did, untethering just the smallest little rivulet of air, and it made the most terrifying sound as it went through. It always does.
Whatever you've heard from actors pretending to gasp after being choked, the reality is worse. At least no one was with me this time. When that's been the case, the other person has invariably freaked the **** out when they've heard my gasping and choking routine, which only adds the burden of myself having to reassure them through nodding and non-frantic gestures, so that they won't call 911, as I hate the idea of calling the cops.
April 13th of this year was 14 months without me having a drink. During that long stretch I had honestly forgotten why I'd quit. That's right, I had completely purged from my recall the years of nighttime memories of myself almost choking to death, this happening once or twice every couple of weeks on average. Now, the terrifying night wakeups didn't happen even once during the 14 dry months. But 3 weeks back into drinking--oh yeah--there was that thing, wasn't there?.
Now, there was something else I'd forgotten about. And that's the Double Tap. The Double Tap happens when I don't force my drunk and tired and traumatized self to remain awake for a good two or three hours after a choking incident. If I fall back asleep before then, I wake up choking to death all over again. And sure enough, that happened last Friday, and I had to save myself again.
So on Saturday I jumped back on the waggy, and Cinco de Mayo is now my new anniversary date, and that's really enough about drinking. I'm not here to write about that business. I should have been done with it; and now I am.
My flight leaves for Reno in a few hours, and I'll be out there for the next 3 weeks scouting out the live poker games in the city. If I like it, that's where I'm moving to.
[the flop] early in the conversation find a kind yet vague way to question her about the repeated calls
[the turn] use her response as a segue to let her know you appreciate her friendship but find more value in the single life
[the river] play your own hand from here
Re: Helen. Is tomorrow's meeting of the business variety, for a company where you're no longer employed (except on a fill-in basis, as necessary)?
If so, I guess I'd just say, "no, I'm not a part of that organization any more. I won't be attending."
If it's a personal meeting, that's tougher. It's nice to see people from your past, but don't want to give false hope.
Good luck. Hope it goes well.
None of the old business is involved. She flew to the US to visit me.
[the flop] early in the conversation find a kind yet vague way to question her about the repeated calls
[the turn] use her response as a segue to let her know you appreciate her friendship but find more value in the single life
[the river] play your own hand from here
Thanks RedeYeS00! Solid advice. I believe that I made my annoyance at the repeated calls and texts plain to her, and she did stop. But I will hold on to discussing it as well as an option for sure.
Today I found out that poker crusher/coach/vlogger Brad Owen is stuck $70,000 so far this year, after putting in like 700+ hours. Kudos to Owen for owning up to it. I know how difficult it can be to post losses on the Internet, and my personal brand doesn't rely on winrate like his does.
Spoiler
I don't have a personal brand, AFAIK.
But so much for my 350 hours being significant theory. This is a brutal game.
I finished four full days in a row for the first time that I can remember, and I worked 40 hours/week for two weeks in a row, also a first. I now have two days off to spend with friends.
MGM Springfield $1/$2 poker: 7 hours
+$348.00
MGM Springfield Slots: 3 hours
+$86.41
Running Poker Total from Sept. 2024: 58 hours, +$169.00
Running Slot Total from Sept. 2024: 23 hours, +$1617.73
Total from Sept. 2024: 81 hours, +$1786.73
I still find your idea from a few years back that Helen is interested in you for a green card as somewhat funny. She seems to as you stated to have a good finically successful business that likely requires her to be in Taiwan. I think she’s just looking for a big tall, well read westerner to spend some intimate time with well on on a work trip.
I still find your idea from a few years back that Helen is interested in you for a green card as somewhat funny. She seems to as you stated to have a good finically successful business that likely requires her to be in Taiwan. I think she’s just looking for a big tall, well read westerner to spend some intimate time with well on on a work trip.
Well, like me, she's doing what she wants, but she's not hugely successful just yet. What she really wants, she has told me, is to move to the US and get a green card. In any case, I'm not attracted to her.
Yeah I also think she just likes you, and yep, you seem to have some kind of fear hiding there, you also told me that story in person at least twice 😉 To get that green card by marriage she could have moved on to other targets long ago.
Generally speaking, yes, for those readers who are not aware, and as someone who has looked into that more than the average peep, despite of what you may have heard on certain news channels, immigrating to the US, I mean legally, is actually far from easy, it's tougher than with most countries. But it can be done with enough commitment and endurance, there are several pathways, marriage is just one of them
Yeah I also think she just likes you, and yep, you seem to have some kind of fear hiding there, you also told me that story in person at least twice 😉 To get that green card by marriage she could have moved on to other targets long ago.
Generally speaking, yes, for those readers who are not aware, and as someone who has looked into that more than the average peep, despite of what you may have heard on certain news channels, immigrating to t
Solid post. You're likely right and I'm being paranoid. In any case, we're incompatible on other levels and it's a no-go.
Yesterday's visit with Helen was disasteriffic, to borrow a term from Final Fantasy X-II.
I got into an accident in Providence, RI; my fault. No one was hurt, thankfully. The Jeep's hood is a little bent up and I messed up the other guy's fender and trunk pretty badly. And the rest of the day didn't go much better.
I'm off to visit Will and his wife, who needs to have a name, so let's go with Octavia (I change everyone's names in here or use their screennames). I may have named her before but I can't find it anywhere in the thread.
I'll post a full TR in a day or two.
accidental jeep actions happen in the epicenter of insurance coverage
I'll try to write up the unfortunate Providence TR before leaving for work tomorrow; in the meantime, I'll update the tally, as that at least has been going pretty well.
This morning I woke up very early at Will and Octavia's house in Norwich, and from there I hit the Mohegan Sun slot floor at 5 AM, only to find two slot grinders already on hand going through the Ultimate X machines at that forsaken hour.
I quickly gave up on the Mohegan Sun and took off for Springfield, where I did a comprehensive slot run before the poker room opened at 10 AM.
My slot sunrun continues. I hit quad aces with a low kicker on a non-multiplier Triple Double Bonus hand, which was good for a 4000 unit win; alas, those units were nickels, so it was $200.
My good luck carried over onto the poker table, where I hit $300 on the football promotion, although my Patriots lost in the process, but that is to be expected this season.
MGM Springfield $1/$2 poker: 6 hours
+$430.00
MGM Springfield Slots: 4 hours
+$225.09
Running Poker Total from Sept. 2024: 64 hours, +$599.00
Running Slot Total from Sept. 2024: 27 hours, +$1842.82
Total from Sept. 2024: 91 hours, +$2441.82
Not to divulge all your secrets but is your slot play mostly snapping off Ultimate X multipliers or you still doing a good percentage of advantage slot plays.
Not to divulge all your secrets but is your slot play mostly snapping off Ultimate X multipliers or you still doing a good percentage of advantage slot plays.
It used to be 50/50, but now that they've cycled out at least half of the advantage slots, it's probably now 80/20 on the X video poker. I don't think it will be long before those start being heavily monitored, like they seem to be at Mohegan.
I'm off to work again. I started working on the Helen/Providence TR, but it's far from done. I have Tuesday and Wednesday off, so we'll see.
