The costs of trans visibility

The costs of trans visibility

Yesterday, Dylan Mulvaney broke her silence: https://www.tiktok.com/@dylanmulvaney/vi....

For context, this is a trans influencer who built a 10 million strong following on TikTok. She took a brand deal with budweiser to post an ad on an instagram, and the anti-trans right went absolutely ballistic, calling for a boycott, condemning the company, and to some perhaps unknowable degree it influenced that Budweiser sales dropped by a 1/4 and

. Dylan speaks more personally about the effect of the hatred on her.

What strikes me about this story is that it is just about visibility. This isn't inclusion in sports or gender-affirming care for minors, it was just that a trans person was visible. This wasn't even visibility in a TV commerical that a poor right-winger is forced to see, it was an ad on her own instagram page. We're all in our own social media algorithm influenced bubbles, but from my vantage point it really has seemed that in the last year or so things have just gotten worse for trans people and the backlash to even minor visibility is growing.

We need to do better.

w 1 View 1
30 June 2023 at 04:48 PM
Reply...

6818 Replies

i
a

by uke_master P

Nobody is proposing some imaginary pro-rape rules.

Some people in fact are, as previously mentioned. You should not imagine that these people are 'trans', because they generally aren't. They are using the 'trans' thing as a wedge.


by chillrob P

I think if special spaces were given to trans people, that would cause fewer objections.

Trans activists don't want that. They want to maintain existing segregation rules, but they want access to women's segregated spaces and sports.


by chillrob P

I didn't say anything about objectively determining who is trans, but about who is a woman. Maybe a minor difference, but it seems important to me, because women are the ones special privileges and spaces are given to, not trans people. I think if special spaces were given to trans people, that would cause fewer objections.

However, except in extremely rare circumstances, I don't think there should be separate spaces for anyone. You seemed

Most of the rules proponents of trans rights suggest are just allowing trans people to do things any other woman is allowed to do. Like IF we have gendered bathrooms THEN trans people should be allowed to go in the bathroom they identify with. Like sure maybe I'm somewhat on board with the idea that we should move away from gendered bathrooms, and maybe we will, but as long as we do then trans people should be allowed in them.

This doesn't really pose any problem with the "definition" of women, basically everyone knows exactly what everyone else is talking about in these cases when we say something like a trans woman should be allowed in a woman's bathroom. Its no more legally murky than any other legal topic having to do with definitions and the like.


by hole in wan P

He's just being Uke. He just dishonestly sent you searching for a definition in his post history that doesn't exist. He knows he looks ridiculous but I'm sure in his mind it's justified

Look, gender ideology is the root of all these controversies. Men in womens sports, transitioning kids, the pronoun police including the canadian human rights code, drag queen story hour, men in women's shelters, men in women's prison, etc. At the root of gen

None of this actually responds to the definition I gave. It is just Matt Walsh style guffawing. Not that I care at all about "defining" what a woman is, but you seemed desperate for me to do so, so a little amusing that you didn't bother engaging with the provided definition one iota.


by rickroll P

let's go defend rape for a few dozen posts in a row

Ya buddy, I get that you like to make things up horrible things you think your opponents believe (take your "you support rape" and "sham marriage" nonsense), but I've(obviously) made zero posts "defending rape". I have pointed out certain people's obsession with the "bad trans person of the day" MO, and how "the bad trans rapist who gets murdered" fits that regular narrative. But that isn't within the same galaxy as defending rape. Obviously.


amazing how uke just crumbles into pieces once luciom stops posting news random pieces that always allow an easy escape to divert his collapsing argument onto a fresh topic


by uke_master P

Ya buddy, I get that you like to make things up horrible things you think your opponents believe (take your "you support rape" and "sham marriage" nonsense), but I've(obviously) made zero posts "defending rape". I have pointed out certain people's obsession with the "bad trans person of the day" MO, and how "the bad trans rapist who gets murdered" fits that regular narrative. But that isn't within the same galaxy as defending rape. Obvious

i never said any of this, really sad and pathetic you need to make stuff up like people are advocating killing trans

I've also pointed out to you multiple times that i was obviously joking when i said you support rape but you prefer to be a victim

you have since however continued to double and triple down that trans should have have carte blanche in the bedroom, have you learned nothing from metoo?

if i were to disguise myself as a woman, seduce lesbians, and hide the existence of my penis from them we made out, as I go down on them, and get them good and drunk and tell them it's a strap on and I'm shy due to this being so newly out of the closet so doggy style in the dark fully clothed in only way etc etc is that not rape?


Um I have lucium on ignore, so no whatever he posts has almost no effect on my posting.


by rickroll P

i never said any of this, really sad and pathetic you need to make stuff up like people are advocating killing trans

Lol reading comprehension fail. I didn't say anything at all suggesting you were "advocating killing trans". The bit where you said I "support rape" though is a direct quote from you. A shameful fabrication, so perhaps you are overly eager to imagine I would also do shameful fabrications, but unlike you I always have receipts.


Sigh, rick's editing his own posts sometimes makes responses to the edited posts seem weird.

by rickroll P

I've also pointed out to you multiple times that i was obviously joking when i said you support rape but you prefer to be a victim

Lol, the "I was joking" routine. I actually don't think you have tried to laugh that off previously. But regardless, buddy, I don't think anyone took you seriously that you meant the stupid things you said. But you're still going to be called out for saying stupid things, joking or otherwise.

you have since however continued to double and triple down that trans should have have carte blanche in the bedroom, have you learned nothing from metoo?

Do you mean "trans people"? But no, I've said literally not one word on this topic. Is this another one of your "jokes"? haha.


by chillrob P

They're starting to be pretty common in businesses in Portland and Seattle. It feels a bit funny when you're using a urinal and a woman comes in, but it doesn't seem to bother them.

Lol I find that kinda weird actually, unisex toilets over my way don't have urinals, just cubicles.
Edit: Just seen your later post clarifying the issue.


by chillrob P

I didn't say anything about objectively determining who is trans, but about who is a woman. Maybe a minor difference, but it seems important to me, because women are the ones special privileges and spaces are given to, not trans people. I think if special spaces were given to trans people, that would cause fewer objections.

However, except in extremely rare circumstances, I don't think there should be separate spaces for anyone. You seemed

Curious why you support unisex bathrooms. Is it just because you view it as equal?

The pro argument seems obvious but: in many cases we don't want to be blasting farts etc in front of other gender. Could be awkward to pee in front of them.

There's sex stuff. Women don't want to be leered at or spied on. Guys don't want to accidentally do something wrong. Like turn around from a urinal a little too soon and there's a 12 year old girl there. Or walk in on a woman in a stall.

In general, we both have an extra layer of social obligation and decorum around the opposite gender and it can be nice to take a break. Most want to just relax when doing something that is usually private.


you caught me uke, i actually reported you to the mounties last week, they should be pulling you over at some point next week on your commute


by ES2 P

Curious why you support unisex bathrooms. Is it just because you view it as equal?

The pro argument seems obvious but: in many cases we don't want to be blasting farts etc in front of other gender. Could be awkward to pee in front of them.

There's sex stuff. Women don't want to be leered at or spied on. Guys don't want to accidentally do something wrong. Like turn around from a urinal a little too soon and there's a 12 year old girl there

rob is deep into the local music scene of portland

i am big into that scene myself

grungy unisex bathrooms are very typical and most people are too inebriated and radically progressive to care much about it seeing a guy at a urinal while waiting for the 3 people doing blow to exit the stall

if you have a kink for seeing women drop their pants and sit on a sink to pee because they don't feel like waiting, start going to punk shows and drink plenty so you'll need to make frequent bathroom visits


by rickroll P

rob is deep into the local music scene of portland

i am big into that scene myself

grungy unisex bathrooms are very typical and most people are too inebriated and radically progressive to care much about it seeing a guy at a urinal while waiting for the 3 people doing blow to exit the stall

if you have a kink for seeing women drop their pants and sit on a sink to pee because they don't feel like waiting, start going to punk shows and drink ple

Reminds me of going to clubs in Brazil nearly 20 years ago. They were far ahead of us on these things I guess.

Anyway, there were these massive clubs for gay, straight, trans. Just a big free for all. They also were less racially divided.

The bathrooms were originally designed as m/f but this was completely ignored. This added to the fun and the vibe as it was just a super free environment. Plus it's loud, everyone is wasted, etc. Plus, no children are around.

Of course, in other settings, they have regular BRs.


by ES2 P

Curious why you support unisex bathrooms. Is it just because you view it as equal?

The pro argument seems obvious but: in many cases we don't want to be blasting farts etc in front of other gender. Could be awkward to pee in front of them.

There's sex stuff. Women don't want to be leered at or spied on. Guys don't want to accidentally do something wrong. Like turn around from a urinal a little too soon and there's a 12 year old girl there

I support unisex everything. I think most of the awkwardness is cultural and would go away if people didn't grow up with the cultural hangups.

Although I actually think it would be better not to have urinals in public restrooms either. I use them because I don't want to wait extra time, but I don't particularly like urinating in public and seeing other guys do it myself.


by ES2 P

Reminds me of going to clubs in Brazil nearly 20 years ago. They were far ahead of us on these things I guess.

Anyway, there were these massive clubs for gay, straight, trans. Just a big free for all. They also were less racially divided.

The bathrooms were originally designed as m/f but this was completely ignored. This added to the fun and the vibe as it was just a super free environment. Plus it's loud, everyone is wasted, etc. Plus, n

Brazil managed race a lot better because there was a huge amount of miscegenation, so almost everyone would be black under the one drop rule, even if many people are white passing.

lately they went crazy because of wokism and grade skin colour (in tribunal if necessary) to do their version of AA unfortunately.

but among the people, racism isn't anything close to what it was in the USA because most people feel they are Mulatto one way or another.

which is the only possible pacifying endgame tbh


by chillrob P

I support unisex everything. I think most of the awkwardness is cultural and would go away if people didn't grow up with the cultural hangups.

Although I actually think it would be better not to have urinals in public restrooms either. I use them because I don't want to wait extra time, but I don't particularly like urinating in public and seeing other guys do it myself.

yes sure it's cultural to be a drunk 19y woman in a bathroom vomiting with her friend and not liking the idea of 3 drunk boys entering while you are vomiting because of OBVIOUS SERIOUS RISKS


luciom, she's too deep in the k-hole to even be aware the boys are in the bathroom let alone care about it


by rickroll P

luciom, she's too deep in the k-hole to even be aware the boys are in the bathroom let alone care about it

but I am not when I have to keep her up as she is my daughter


don't bring your daughter to the club and let her drink so much she pukes

and why are you giving her ketamine?


by rickroll P

don't bring your daughter to the club and let her drink so much she pukes

and why are you giving her ketamine?

age of consent for everything is 18 in normal countries. I don't bring, she goes.

I won't give drugs to my children.

true, they are 11 and 8 right now (8 is the daughter), but can I ****ing care about her being a little safer when 13 or 16 or 19?

I can, and I do.


by Luciom P

yes sure it's cultural to be a drunk 19y woman in a bathroom vomiting with her friend and not liking the idea of 3 drunk boys entering while you are vomiting because of OBVIOUS SERIOUS RISKS

Being drunk in a club when you are underage certainly is cultural and should be done away with. No one is supposed to be served to that extent, and the penalties for such should be ratcheted up until it stops happening.

If things like this are happening there should be security in the restrooms right now, because drunk guys will still go into ladies rooms.

But then I can't imagine anyone wanting to have sex with someone who is vomiting, and the stall door should be closed anyway.


by chillrob P

Being drunk in a club when you are underage certainly is cultural and should be done away with. No one is supposed to be served to that extent, and the penalties for such should be ratcheted up until it stops happening.

If things like this are happening there should be security in the restrooms right now, because drunk guys will still go into ladies rooms.

But then I can't imagine anyone wanting to have sex with someone who is vomiting, an

19 is not underage in ****ing normal countries lol.

and everyone will serve you anything at night everywhere in the Mediterranean area.

are you even real? when I was 16 alcohol was infinite everywhere


by Luciom P

age of consent for everything is 18 in normal countries. I don't bring, she goes.

I won't give drugs to my children.

true, they are 11 and 8 right now (8 is the daughter), but can I ****ing care about her being a little safer when 13 or 16 or 19?

I can, and I do.

Hopefully you're teaching them not to go out to clubs and get so drunk that they puke and are not aware of their surroundings.


Reply...